It has been an “OK” day. Brently had surgery 2 weeks ago this past Monday. He had to have a G-tube – (feeding tube) revision because of infection that spread throughout his abdomen due to some complications in changing out the tube. He is home bound for 5 more weeks due to more infection and I can’t risk him getting any worse.
I ask myself these questions from time to time now. How does one celebrate for one child and still continue to mourn the loss of another child? Can I be still be happy for the one I still have here with me? Will this sadness linger on forever?
As this years 2014 Thanksgiving rolls around, my mind drifts throughout each day of how thankful I am. There are so many things that have come my way and so many people in and out of my life that have meant so much to me and that I am thankful for.
Tonight, I sit here thinking of all the what if’s, what could have been’s, and I don’t know why I allow my mind to go in that direction. Brent is 15 years old. He should have a permit and learning how to drive. He should have friend’s over spending the night, coming and going and having a busy schedule of some kind.